EPISODE 9:

Are You too Flaky to be Successful in Business?


This week's episode of Chill & Prosper is for anyone who has been told that they're too flaky to be successful in business.

Maybe you can’t finish any of your ideas - or you’re struggling to find the perfect business idea.

If you can’t commit to one idea, if you have a million domain names or you worry you won’t ever make money, this episode is for you! 

I'm really excited about this one, because I’ve been there myself! 

 

I talk about ...

  • How to not implement every idea that comes your way
  • Why people will pay you for ideas
  • Your fortune isn't in your followup

 

Links

Hey! Oh, my gosh. I'm so excited about today's topic, because it can be a real game-changer for a lot of entrepreneurs. Today, I am talking especially to people who have been told that they're flaky, that they can't finish anything, and that they're really struggling to find one business idea to suit them. This is particularly for you if you find yourself jumping from business to business, if you have a million domain names, if you can't articulate what you do, and if you've just generally been told that you're a flake who should finish what you started,

I'm really excited about this one, because this is really going to help you. Okay. In a lot of ways, a lot of entrepreneurs have these tendencies. You're in business for yourself because you're an idea-generating machine. You are someone who's always thinking about possibilities and you can probably see a lot of different paths for you.

I don't mind saying this about myself. I'm a bit of a jack-of-all-trades. I could be good at a lot of different things. I could go into other professions. I could have gone down a lot of different routes and I generally figure it out. I suspect that you're that person as well. You can just figure stuff out.

What if, though, that is a real pain point for you? What if you are somebody who is really experiencing pain around that at the moment? Because you aren't sticking with anything long enough to make any money. Now, I've seen this quite a few times with someone who is in such an unhealthy space around this, that they're just super flaky. Like they don't finish anything, they don't deliver stuff to clients, and they just bounce from place to place. It can be a really crappy place to be in yourself. But also, if you know people like this, this can be really tricky as well.

So in the Sacred Money Archetypes, for example, which I am... I've certified in that method, which is Kendall Summerhawk's course. These people would be called the alchemists, which is a perfect name for it, right? So this is those people who always seem to find their fate, because money just comes up out of the blue. You might just get checks out of the blue or a big sum of money might come to you at the last minute. You might've even been called a lucky bitch, which is why you might've even found me in the first place; because you're like, "Oh, I've been called a lucky bitch. I need to check out this book from Denise."

Now, I see a lot of entrepreneurs in this space, particularly if you've just got that kind of ADHD brain, where you can see all the different possibilities and maybe you really suffer from shiny object syndrome. I totally get it myself. Even though I'm not necessarily an alchemist on the sacred money archetypes quiz, I do have these tendencies myself. Okay. Some top-line stuff that you are not going to get, you're going to resist, and you're just not going to believe me. You ready?

People will pay you for your ideas. People will pay you for your idea-generating brain and people will pay you just to solve problems and come up with ideas for them. You don't believe it. You're going to listen to this whole podcast and not believe it, because you've probably been told from a very early age that you're a daydreamer, that you're unrealistic, that you have to stick with one thing, that you can't follow through. All of these things, instead of realizing that this is your superpower. You might think that everybody can come up with ideas. You might think that everyone has a different, like 50 different businesses that they could do, but they don't. You might see it more in the entrepreneurial world and think everyone is like that, but they're not. People like you are needed in the world to birth ideas.

It doesn't mean that you're responsible for all of those ideas. Now, when you give birth to a baby in a hospital, a doula or midwife can be there to help you birth the baby; but then they're not responsible to take home that baby and raise it until college. So think of yourself as a doula of ideas. It does not mean that you have to follow each one down the path. That doesn't mean that when you get excited about an idea, that you have to go buy the domain name, and then beat yourself up about the fact that you don't follow through with that business. It's okay that you've birthed that idea, but what do you actually do with that information? Because I have a lot of these people in my life. I know a lot of people who are these idea-generating machines and they can get themselves in a real tizzy. Okay?

So one, you don't have to implement every idea that comes your way. You just don't. You don't have to buy the domain name. You can offer it up to the universe. You can offer it up to a client. You can spend your days coming up and brainstorming all the ways a business could work and you can be a consultant for other people in that industry. You don't actually have to choose.

I saw this in a group recently. Someone was like, "Hey guys, I've got all these ideas. Should I go down this route, this route, this route." There were three completely different businesses completely. She was like, "I just don't know which one to go for, because II could be good at either of them." And I was like, "What if you're an idea person?" It's just like, "What? What does that even mean?" I'm like, "Well, what if you just like... You could be a consultant to people in that industry. You can help people brainstorm problems in their business. You could work on a lot of different businesses every day. You could be a creative coach. You can be a creativity coach. You could run retreats for people, where you just help them might brainstorm and give birth to their ideas. You can be an ideas doula."

We just don't value that in our society. We don't value those idea generators. We don't, because there's so much put on finishing, completing, staying, sticking with a project till the end. So, if this is you and you're an idea generator, you might've heard things like, well you've made your bed, you have to lie in it; we've bought that course, now you have to finish it. Instead of really revering you as someone who can see different perspectives, multiple possibilities. That makes you a really great coach consultant, incubator, holder of space, reflector of other people's ideas, a problem solver, a brainstormer, somebody who can see possibilities for other people.

Already, you can see how that could work in the practical world, right? You could literally just sell an hour of your time and just say, "Bring me your stuff, right? Bring me your problems." Because you probably do that already for free. You probably do that with friends, with family members. You probably have done that since you were a little kid, but there's just something there about resisting doing it as a business; because maybe you think, "Well, I need to get a certificate. I need to be an idea-generator certified coach." No. You could sell an hour of your time being creative, helping people solve problems. If you wanted to, you could niche down into different industries.

Say, for example, you wanted to work in the entertainment industry. Well, you could help people who have a dance studio solve problems about their dance studio. You don't have to be super generic, but you don't have to follow the thread on every business. You don't have to be a completer finisher. Okay. You don't believe me. I know you don't believe me and that's okay that other people can't generate ideas by themselves. You don't believe me because it's so easy for you.

Let me tell you a few ways that I work with idea generators in my business. So when I pitched my book to a printer, to my publisher, they said, "Great. We want to see three different subtitles." I was so tired and burnt out. I was like, "Oh, man." I need all my energy to write the book and I'm pregnant. I just didn't have the energy for it. So there are people who will brainstorm ideas with you. There are people who will help you come up with product names.

I hired someone who has this as a service and we spend an hour together and she was like, "Who's the audience? Who's it for? What's the feel of the book?" She had a lot of different questions that she asked me. Then we sat there on a shared Google doc, which is really important and I'll tell you why in a second or later after the break. We talked about the different ideas. We came up with 20 of them, then we went through them all. I needed to borrow her brain for an hour. I can come up with ideas myself, but it's not my true zone of genius like it is for some people. Maybe some people like you.

So I borrowed her brain and her creativity for an hour, because I needed to make space for it and I needed to have the accountability for it. I didn't have the bandwidth to do it myself. That was really valuable for me and I can't even remember how much it was. I think it was maybe $500. You think, "Why would you pay $500 for something you can just do yourself?" Because I didn't have the bandwidth. I didn't have the bandwidth to be creative and I needed it done. A publisher was paying me to come up with these book titles, so I paid someone to do it.

NNow I've done that multiple times, by the way. I did it when I was naming some of my programs, naming some of my offerings, when I needed to speak to someone about how I should put together a program. I've hired people to look at my courses and come up with ideas to make them better. I value paying people for idea generation and other people will value you as well. Now I mentioned the shared Google doc. That is highly symbolic and it could be something that you're really, really screwing up right now if you're an idea generator and I will reveal all after the break. See you in a sec.

Hi, Denise. I'm a chiropractor. I live in Surrey. I moved to England from Australia, 10 years ago. I own a practice, Northcote Chiropractic, in Clapham, London. I have been in business for eight years. I read Chillpreneur and Get Rich, Lucky Bitch in 2019. At the time, I was in a massive victim mode because I was the breadwinner. My company was turning over £500,000, but we were still in a very... I was in a victim mindset.

Anyway, reading your books, I came back to England. I then rented a much bigger house, because I remember you said you couldn't buy the penthouse; so you rented it and renting that bigger house meant that we could totally step into a better work energy and be on purpose. So my husband has actually had the best financial year during 2020 and, myself, my business has also had the best financial year in 2020. I have also... You inspired me to start to create a passive income. I nearly didn't do this recording because I don't feel like I've totally achieved that yet, but I'm well on my way. So thank you, Denise. You're amazing.

Okay. Welcome back. Oh, my gosh. Remember I said at the start of this topic, that if you are an idea generator, you're not going to believe me that people pay for ideas. I've just given you proof that I've paid for idea generation regularly. Oftentimes, I've hired someone in my business. Remember I hired a launch coach one time. I know how to launch. I've bought courses on how to launch, but I just needed, again, to borrow someone's brain for an hour and say, "What do you think about this?" I just needed an extra person and there are so many people in business. They don't have coworkers. They don't have people at the water cooler to bounce ideas off. They're looking for people who can spark ideas. That is what this is. You're not flaky. You're not someone who just can't commit. You are an idea generator. You spark ideas into the universe. Remember? It doesn't mean you have to birth them and take them all home.

All right. So I mentioned this Google doc thing. Okay. This is really, really clever. I don't know if this idea generator did it on purpose, but what I've noticed is people who are idea generators are often really bad at follow through; because it's just not their zone of genius. So I'll have a session with someone and they'll go, "Oh, I'll send you a written report." Then they never send it; or they go, "Oh, I'll send you the recording" and they never send it; or "Oh yeah, I'll type up these notes and I'll send them to you," and they never send it. It's not their fault. It's not that you're flaky. It's just that idea generators are better in the moment. They're better at divine downloads in the moment. They're not so good at the mundane kind of details.

So what this idea generator did... This is what the lady that I hired to help me come up with three subtitles for my book, Chillpreneur, to give to my publisher. We worked on a shared Google doc together. So I could see her typing. I added stuff as well. We would highlight stuff. We would move it around. We would bold ideas that we liked. Then when the hour finished, there was nothing to do. There was nothing for her to deliver. I was responsible then for sending that to my publisher. It just made me really realize how powerful that is to stay in your zone of genius of... I opened the container. I opened the magic. I will pour my magic into you and then I will close the container. So what does that mean for you? If you're an idea generator or if you're some sort of coach or consultant, stop promising stuff that you're just not going to deliver or stop promising things that make you feel burdened.

Okay. Let's play this out. Say, for example, you're a life coach or a business coach. Stop providing notes for people. You can say at the start of the call, "Hey, listen, you're welcome to take notes and make it your responsibility." You can record the call, but here's the thing too. In Zoom, for example, you can change it in the setting that calls will automatically record; because if you're just a little bit of a forgetful person, sometimes you might forget to hit record. That's okay. We've all been there. We've all done it, but just find these ways to run your business in a way that doesn't sabotage you and doesn't create more stress.

There's another little feature in Zoom that you might not know. You can actually... When you're having a meeting with someone, you can allow the other person to record it. I've been in sessions with people who are these alchemist idea generators and they say, "You're welcome to record this if you'd like." Because then you don't even have to send the recording to them afterwards. You can just say, "Yep, you're welcome to record this. If you want to." Then give them permission to do it, which is definitely a setting that you can do in Zoom or you can let them record it on Skype or record it in whatever way works for them.

That way, you're not having to remember. You're designing your business for success and you're working in your zone of genius. Your unapologetic zone of genius. I've even had people say to me... I've had psychic sessions with people and they say, "I'm not going to remember a word of this afterwards, because I just opened the channel and it all comes out and that's that's enough." It's like, "Yeah, cool. I'm responsible for taking the notes and looking at the things." I don't expect anything afterwards.

That's what I'm saying about the shared Google doc. It was just such a very small thing that this idea generator did, but it made me realize how powerful it was. You're probably going to take notes anyway, so you may as well set it up in advance and then you don't have to do it afterwards. It's so great. Okay. There's a couple of other basic things you can do like that. For example, if you are terrible at chasing up payments afterwards and you just know that you're that kind of... You get excited at the start, but once it's finished, you're never going to chase that payment up. Make your clients pay upfront. Set yourself up for success. Don't set yourself up to sabotage everything. Okay? Don't do things that you know you're not going to do. And don't beat yourself up thinking, "Oh, I really just need to get to just be more organized." If you're an idea generating person, your value to people will come in you being spontaneous. Outsource and automate everything else. Stay in your zone of genius. People will pay you for that.

Okay. As I said, if this is you, you're not going to believe me. You're going to resist it. You're just going to continue thinking you're flaky and you just haven't found the right business idea yet. I'm just here to remind you again and again, that your umbrella, your business is ideas. Your business is the value that you can breathe possibility into the universe. Your fortune isn't in your followup. Your fortune isn't in your reports and the thing that you can generate. Your fortune is in the moment.

So here's one more thing to think about. As I've said, I've got a little bit of this, but Mark is my husband who's also in my business. He's the opposite to this. His value comes in what he can finish and what he can complete. So we work really well together, because I'll start things and I'll run out of steam and he'll finish them. If you can hand things over to people and create a system in your business, where you can start something and you can hand it over, then feel complete with that. That is your completion. The handing over is your completion and you can feel complete and good in that.

                                                So the trouble in our business came when Mark expected me to also finish us off and he had to be like, "No, my part's done. No it's your turn to finish it." The other thing I had to be okay with was... When I did speaking, I realized that I would be best just in the moment and just having those divine downloads, but Mark doesn't work that way. He would start to freak me out because he'd be like, "Do you know what you're talking about? Have you done your slides? Have you practiced? Have you rehearsed?" And I'd be like, "Oh, shit. I guess I should do those things. Otherwise, I'm a flaky person." So I felt like I couldn't charge people for speaking, because I didn't prepare slides ahead of time. I didn't rehearse. I didn't really think a lot about what I was going to do. Instead of realizing my zone of genius, ease in the divine downloads, it is being spontaneous, and coming up with things in the moment.

So I started judging myself against his standards of work, not my own, which is really a whole lesson for this whole session. You might not be an idea generating person, but thank you for listening to this. The lesson is, set yourself up for success, outsource the rest, and it really can be easy. That thing that you're discounting, that you're thinking is not a real thing, that people won't pay you for, that's what we're here to do. We're here to do the stuff that is easy and enjoyable. We're here to do the stuff that we would do all day long for free and charge for. That's what we're here to do. We're not here to find the hard thing. We're not here to get out of our comfort zone or learn to be better at the things we suck at.

We're here to make it easy and enjoyable and to role model that for other people. It's okay for you to make money from your ideas. It's okay for you to make money out of your idea generating ability. It's okay for you to make money out of just creating possibility for other people and not following through. It's okay for you to birth the baby and then hand it over to the mom and never to be seen again. You do not have to take home every idea. You do not have to buy every domain name to be used for your own purposes. You are enough as an idea generator. The world actually needs you to birth these ideas into possibility. This is going to bring up a lot of stuff for you. Definitely reach out to me. It's okay for you to prosper from this, but I know it's going to bring up some money mindset stuff.

It's going to open up some unlearning. Maybe some old memories are coming up about being shamed about being a daydreamer, about not following through, about not choosing something. This is all money stuff that I can help you with. Definitely come and join us in Money Bootcamp, if you need to give yourself permission to prosper for your skills and talents. All right, gorgeous. People will pay for ideas. It's a thing. It is a thing, I promise. It is. I know you don't believe me, still. After all this time, but that's okay. I believe in you. I'll be right back after this little break.

Hi, my name is Erin and I run [Matcha-U-Tea], an online Japanese green tea business. I just read Chillpreneur and it was amazing to see how to effectively scale a business without burning out. I've been in business about three years now and I'm wondering how to take that next step without having to work twice as hard, because I already worked very hard. Denise has shown me easy ways to manage my time and to be able to scale and grow without burning out or exhausting myself. Thank you, Denise. It's fantastic to have resources like this. I look forward to reading more. Thanks.

Hi, my name is Genevieve [Sussau] and I live in A Thousand Islands in Canada. I own a health and wellness center. I downloaded Get Rich for my flight to Morocco and I was hooked. You need good money role models. This just hit me so hard. So I joined some coaching programs after reading this and I found people that I actually wanted to be like. I've never felt happier and more abundant in my life. I literally feel like I can manifest anything, including this. I was practicing last week for all the things I'd say to Denise on her podcast when I made it and here I am. Denise is the real deal. She's your girl. Go for it.

Hey, beautiful. Welcome back and here's my final thought for today's episode. This is a real personal one for me. I met Oprah a couple of years ago and she was like, "What did you get from my show?" And I said, "To break the cycle." She just nodded and she was like, "Yes." That's something that even Mark and I talk about a lot. Break the cycle, break the cycle. It's a pattern interrupter for me. Whenever I find myself going into old patterns or I take on something that's not mine. We can't underestimate how hard it can be to sometimes to break the cycle, so some of the money patterns that you have, some of the sabotages you have around your money or your business, it could be old stuff that comes from your family. It's okay to break the cycle. It's okay to break the cycle of dysfunction. It's okay to break the cycle of poverty. It's okay to break the cycle of feast or famine in your business. It's not yours. You can break the cycle.

For those of you listening, who have broken free of old family patterns, give yourself kudos on that. It's not easy. It's not easy to break free from old stuff. It's not free to break free of just, "That's the way things are done in my family or in my country." There's a lot of stuff that's against us sometimes, breaking those patterns. So yeah, break the cycle. I said to Oprah, too. I was like, "I watched your show every day after school." And she was like, "Oh, I raised you." And I was like, "Yes." So if you're an Oprah baby like me and you learned to break the cycle, let me know. Reach out on social media. I'm @DeniseDT all over the interwebs and I would love to hear how you are breaking the cycle, because I am in your corner and I'm here to support you the whole way. All right, my gorgeous one. Go forth. Chill and prosper. Break that cycle. Peace out for me and I will see you on the next episode. Bye.

About the Show

Chill & Prosper is your weekly dose of money mindset, marketing and humour from best-selling author and entrepreneur Denise Duffield-Thomas.

Denise's philosophy is that there is ALWAYS an easier way to make money and that's what she's here to help you do. Each week, you'll get actionable advice to help you make more money, with less work. There's no need to hustle - let Denise show you how to embrace the Chillpreneur way.

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